Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Well I'm not saying you hang on there in fantasy and not take reality at all. You can have that happiness without having to elope from you reality. How? Its called, trying different things once in a while, doing something different in a day that you rarely do or not do at all.
lets see... Today? Show some lovin' by pampering yourself.... lets see... how about a long shower? in that way you would feel relaxed, refreshed and ready to face the world! And seriously say... you would feel good about yourself that it attracts people and positive energies.
So if you wanna know what I'm babbling about here? get into that shower and lets see what happens. aryt? ciao people... till next post :)
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Remembering that feeling so overwhelming when something good pass our way, when we are blessed with so much abundance that you sometimes wonder how amazing can life get, and in such amazing blessing, we are more inspired to work hard to retain that feeling of enthusiasm… that excitement. But there are moments when we finally found ourselves working our ass off, we tend to lose that feeling when everything seemed to be so brand new turns to be just the ordinary things we live day by day, we lose the momentum. And we become tired and bored with the situation, well perhaps it was because we are already used to the situation, that everything seemed ordinary, which only meant we are now at our comfort zone, and once we do, it’s about time we change pace, or perhaps take a step higher, find something that will bring back that feeling of wanting to be better, take on another challenge.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
How does it feel to be alive? I say it’s this moment, this moment when I am doing something. This moment when I am building myself, this moment when I am creating something good, this is what it takes to be alive… finding and creating something good… something great.
I’ve been passive for a while, and I think that moment of mediocrity is way down in my trash bin, I’m back to the game of life. I have what it takes to become better, some may think I’m not cut out for anything, but the hell with those people, I’m gonna make good and I’m gonna do good.
Okay, seems like I’m ranting now. But I don’t care, I have this moment now, and I’m making use of it… and perhaps the best time to say something to people who seem to think they actually know you, when what? They weren’t there to see you work your ass off to be a good person, they weren’t there to see you grow up. I’m sorry but screw these people. I won’t let you get into me and ruin what I have built, i’m gonna do this, I’m gonna live my life.
And thank you. Thank you for what was said; it makes me want to continue to be better. It makes me want to go on and be better. THANK YOU.
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
I decided to put it all in the basket along with other stuff... I wish to give it away. And just as I am cleaning my room and my closet... I am also throwing old bad memories... something that is just so hard to let go... but this time, I am taking things seriously. Hmmm... its a whole new way to start life again I guess... :)
All these old stuff... I'm thinking of giving it to people who needs it most... As I was packing... my heart is filled with so much hope... that things would eventually fall to its place after this. I wanna feel better... I wanna be the better me, if not the best. And I intend to correct my life this time :)
Monday, March 16, 2009
After a series of commercial shoot for different establishments, we finally launched the commercial last April 16, 2008 at Eagle’s Bar at Marco Polo Hotel, and Media People, advertisers and entrepreneurs were present to witness the event.
I was really so proud because it was my first time to direct a commercial, and I finally made it happen. Would you believe it? Can’t believe it either (lol)
The Ultimate Davao Getaway Guide Commercial were shown in all airports in Mindanao such as
Saturday, March 14, 2009
So if you feel downcasted because of the unfavorable scenario in your life... read the Bible... you would definitely find God talking to you... you want best advice? you can find it there... Encouraging words? still, you can find it there... even good stories... :)
Do Not Lose Heart
Therefore we do not lose heart.Though outwardly we are wasting away,
yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.For our light and momentary troublesare achieving for us an eternal glorythat far outweighs them all.
So we fix our eyes not on what is seen,but on what is unseen.For what is seen is temporary,but what is unseen is eternal.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Aside from these people who showed their gratitude to me, I am also blessed that people I had conflict with sometime in the past, became friends that I could smile with. I never really thought that I could even exchange smiles with these people because of the circumstance we come across with, but hell just that simple "Hello" and a genuine smile made the difference, and things are patched up again.
I am aware that people, especially those that we value can't be there for us sometimes... there will be times that they have to stray far from us, but I do know that friendship are kept... friendship that is just beyond compare... I had the chance to hear the voice of a friend, a very special one... over the phone last night... it was the first that I heard the person's voice after so many months... and that's when I figured that things have really changed but, what is so remarkable is that... real friendship lasts... and its beyond distance and beyond time.
These are just one of the great things that is just so memorable.. it really touched my heart. :)
Friday, March 6, 2009
This is actually my first time to direct a commercial and man, though pressure gets into me sometimes? It also gives me an adrenaline rush… wanting to conquer the moment.
My day started at 6am where I was getting ready for an eight am call time at the Wharf going to Samal Island where the boat of the resort is set to pick us up at the exact time. And me directing went on the entire day… it was so fun… its really a great experience that one shouldn’t miss.
The resort is great place to relax and the rooms and cottages are really nice and a place for comfort… it has rustic native design that gives you a relaxing ambiance. And the view from the top of the guesthouse overlooks the entire resort and the sea.
shooting for the spills on the way to the resort
meet my beautiful VJ and Best Friend, KAT :)
on with the shoot...
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Every once in a while, we find ourselves in great adversity… and too many times we stumble. But hey, having to fall short once in a while is part of life… it makes life not so easy but it is exciting at the same time.
Even the most successful people in history experience different kinds of defeat before they reach success… and mind you they are the likes of Albert Einstein… Thomas Edison… they went through temporary detours before they made a name in history.
For people such as them, they see failure as their teacher, it was their backbone for success… they used it as a tool to manage the future, before they even made a name in history, people think that they don’t amount to something, but they proved everyone wrong. They did not allow painful events to derail them from becoming who they are now.
So if you are experiencing temporary defeat in you life, remember you are not the only who experience defeat… and hey, Failure is an opportunity turned upside down. Think about it.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Today, I remember a tragic event that took place some years ago that really crippled some of the people I know that have been part of my life. Last 2003 of the same day, the day, that I saw one of the people close to me suffered because of a lost of a loved one... and she was the reason why I somehow got inspired to write a film about that incident that took place in the same day.
If you happen to be a regular reader of my blog... you would be familiar with our film entitled: "Marsokwatro", where i made a post about it last year, it is a film inspired by that tragic incident in the Davao International Airport, that robbed the lives of many. The day where, a supposed to be happy reunion turned out to be a day for mourning... a day where a bomb explosion erupted.
I'm blogging about it... because, I happen to recall how it feels like to be in that situation where you don't have any choice but to keep up with the way life just turned out... it was a downright painful experience to go through, but there is no way to run but to accept the reality, that we just can't be with those people we shared our entire life with... and though it was a very tragic event... I believe there is always a room for healing... my friend have moved on, though sometimes we think of him... we talk about him... and she even cry sometimes... but I saw in those eyes, a strong soul, who take things with faith that everything happens for the right reason... sometimes, it may be hard to grasp the real reason behind the situation... but eventually, things just end up the way they should.
To my friend Miah, I know, this is one of the painful moments, a moment of remembrance for our beloved "lolo". I wish you to be the strong soul that I have always believed you to be... I wish I can be there for you in this moment of painful remembering... and share in your moment of pain... but I guess the only thing I can do now, is to let you know that I'm here... and I'll be praying along with your family.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
- BOHOL is one of the nominees in the SEVEN WONDERS OF THE WORLD. Hmmm... isn't it a reason enough to have a taste of BOHOL? tsk tsk :) -- a lot of tourist abroad comes to bohol and get to see its beauty... so why not have a taste of bohol?
- I get to visit the very inviting FLOATING RESTAURANT of the LOBOC RIVER. (The Place where John Lloyd Cruz and Bea Alonzo with Sam Milby had a shoot on ) a very nice place... and THE FOOD? "deliciouso" (delicious) -- Prawns, chicken, Barbecues and the list goes on!
- THE CHOCOLATE HILLS -- a very nice view of the chocolate hills. It was a very nice experience... Finally, I've seen it up close and really, its so amazing that it doesnt have that chocolatey color when you get to have a closer view. :) AMAZING isn't it?
- THE TARSIER -- yes the ENDANGERED TARSIER... Guys, these creatures may be weird looking? but hey, they are so cutie and so gentle... only, when you get to have that moment with TARSIERS? DO NOT TOUCH them and PUT OFF THE FLASHES FROM YOUR CAMERA. -- it is said that once you touch them they DIE. (and we don't want that. right??)
- THE PEOPLE -- yes, the people here are so hospitable and very accommodating. They would even let you in to their humble home... even if you are a complete stranger. No kidding guys. ITS TRUE. I even gained a friend after I visited BOHOL... her name is ROSE.
Saturday, February 28, 2009
My trip to Cotabato City last February 24, 2008 was indeed exciting and fun... having to relax a bit from work and spending time with friends and fellow filmmakers is surely a wonderful experience... we tried out food found in the place and spend time chatting with filmmakers the entire night... and of course taking pictures :)
Hanging out with Filmmakers , a night before the awarding
Playing around with Fern and Sheng
Musoy, me and the lovers... wahaahah!!!
Filmmakers before heading for Notre Dame University
Friday, February 27, 2009
Well... just for today... may I be a love junkie? nyahaha... I don't know what's gotten into this head of mine that I just feel like talking about this kind a BIG word L-O-V-E. wahhh..
Okay... I just heard someone telling me that he was so hurt that he doesn't know if he is still capable of loving... Wow, does this really happen? How does one deal with hurt without having to forget how a good word love is?
With a person with that kind of disposition one would probably say... man, LOVE is a BULL... sad to say, I heard those lines... not just from one person... why do they look at love the way they do? HURT. They were badly hurt that they find it easy to just feel hate than continue loving and hurting at the same time... Wow, I can't believe i'm actually saying this... is this me? nyahaha...
Okay, lets get serious here... I'm not a love junkie but hell... who cares, I'm gonna speak my mind... what do I know about love? All I know is that love is a serious word... and am I capable of loving? I say yes... everyone is gifted with a capacity to love...
I have these lines that I wanna share... some of it really kinda cliche, I heard this from people I come accross with in my entire existence... expressions of loving and getting hurt at the same time...
1. I love him, I really do... but I can't seem to make him change.
- maybe you don't love him that much... I mean for one... before you met him... he is his own person... so why do you have to change him? If you really do love him, why can't you accept the person that he is?... I learned from someone... If you can't change the person?... Change for the person. True enough... sometimes, we need to look at ourselves and reflect on the things we do... I mean for one... you might already be hurting that person for just wanting to change him... how about enjoying what you have?
- Yeah, we sometimes really act so weird when it comes to loving someone... isn't it ironic how we love someone despite of his or her flaws? Well it's what they call acceptance... accepting the person for whatever he is...
3. How can I love the person and hate him at the same time?
- Is there really such a thing? well, based on experience, you don't really hate the person... it's what this person do that you hate. Confront the person on those things that you like... and compromise :)
4. You hurt me too many times... and yet I chose to forgive you... How can you afford to hurt me again?
- If a person hurt you the nth times... don't you think this is something to think about? I mean It's okay to give a person another chance... but if forgiving the person seemed to be routinary... then you need to make a decision now and stand with that decision. remember: its okay to be fooled once... but being fooled over and over again by the same person? its foolishness.
5. He changed... he's not the same person I used to love.
- I got this line just recently from a friend back in High School. People change... we all do... but this is really something to think about... what made him change? Sometimes we need to check ourselves as well... maybe they also see changes in us that made them change... Think about it.
6. I really tried to forget him.. but he keeps on popping my mind.
- That's part of moving on... you can't really forget the person whatever you do. Why? because that person had been part of your life whether you like it or not. Moving on doesn't mean forgetting... its accepting that it's over and accepting that the person is already out of your life.
7. Yes, I still love her... but I had enough.
- This happens when things has been so routinary that they feel they have nothing to give anymore... its like you still love that person... but things aren't working out for the both of you... SPACE... perhaps you need time to think things over and look at your relationship, what could be so wrong?
8. I love him, why can't he love me back?
- This is one of the painful truth in love... because you can't force someone to love us back... don't squeeze love... let love flow at its own course... if it grows... it grows... and if it doesn't? You need to accept and believe that love would come your way in God's Time.
9. I gave everything to him... how can he afford to hurt me?
- I always hear this line... and i'll say it again, Don't let someone be your everything... before going into any relationship... remember that a person only adds up to your life... he is not your life. Don't make him the center of your life.. so that when he goes... you still have something left to start your life all over again... Love is always accompanied by hurt. So you also need to use our head when it comes to loving someone.
10. I'm confused... I know I don't wanna love him anymore... but I still do.
- It takes time to heal from all the hurt... and besides... wounds doesnt heal overnight... so is the heart. Ask yourself... why don't you wanna love him anymore? And do you really want to let go of him... love is a decision... you just don't feel love... you feel it because you want it to. You need to weigh it up... and decide.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Most importantly, he gets to search his heart and take time to reflect on things... one would discern an important lesson that being away from people sometimes doesn't equate with loneliness at all... being alone doesn't always mean being lonely.
A moment of solitude makes one look at the future with confidence that things will eventually fall to its place... it's like, filling in your energy tank to keep up with the vastness of the world.
Friday, February 20, 2009
The road to Silik, Pikit is indeed arduous… It took us almost two hours to reach the place since the area is located at the very nook of Pikit, Cotabato. We passed by a very rough and bulky road, passed by the rice field, where one portion as pointed by our Driver, Kuya Roy, has been a battleground between the AFP and MILF last 2003. When I asked if there are still conflicts going on after 2003, he answered, "Ah, wala na, naundang na tungod sa peace process agreement." (Not anymore, it stopped because of the Peace Process Agreement). I was to ask Kuya Roy another question when a signage caught my eye, "YOU ARE ENTERING AN MILF COMMUNITY", I stared at Kuya Roy with a questioning look and he said, "Boundary ni sa MILF, diri nagpuyo ang mga pamilya sa mga MILF na sundalo"(This is an MILF boundary, the family of the MILF soldiers are residing here.) But where are the soldiers? What happened to them? Kuya Roy, wasn’t able to answer my question since we already arrived at the Silik National High School, where we are about to interview, a guy named, Sulman.
We waited for Sulman at the Principal’s Office, and while waiting, we learned that Sulman is actually one of the outstanding students of the School. And the teachers were really impressed by his attitude, "responsableng bata" (responsible kid). After a minute, I finally met Sulman. Seeing him? There was no sign of a person who has struggled during the MILF-AFP conflict. In fact, he is a picture of a person with cheerful disposition, a person with a positive perspective towards things. Who would have thought that the person we are interviewing were once a child warrior.
At a young age of ten, Sulman already knows how to use an M-16 rifle and has fought in the battlefield with the MILF soldiers against the AFP. I was intrigued with the idea that he actually fought at a very young age… when he should be enjoying his youth playing with kids his age… but it wasn’t like that for him.
In his environment, there is no room for play… for him he has to be in that battle to protect his family… and protecting his family means be in the battleground and fight for what they believed in.
And so I asked Sulman, what are they fighting for? And he simply answered, "Lupang Pangako" (Land of Promise). Somehow, I find him to be having a hard time answering… because of the fact that, it is so hard for him to go back to a certain point of his life when he was in battle and able to see fellow soldiers being killed right in front of him… indeed, a traumatic experience for a boy like him who was 10 years old at that time. And when asked, would he want to be in battle again… he firmly answered, "No, mas gusto kong mag-aral at tulungan ang pamilya ko" (No, I’d rather go to school and help my family.
Sulman came from a deprived family… and yet his disposition about things made him one of the richest people I know… and I know he’ll go a long way… for a boy like him whose right as a child were somehow violated, I admire his outlook in life… for him its time to look at the future with hope and strong determination to face life and be able to help the family. "Marami akong pangarap sa buhay… at gusto kong makatulong sa iba na nangangailangan ng tulong… sa tulad kong naranasan kung paano ang buhay sa isang lugar na laging may gyera. Simple lang ang gusto ko… ayoko maging doctor, abogado, o maging sundalo… gusto ko lang maging social worker… simple lang, dahil gusto kong tumulong…at ang pagiging social worker ang isang paraan ng pagtulong." (I have so many dreams in life… and I like to help others who needs help… those people like me who has experienced how it’s like to live in a place where there is war. All I want is simple… I don’t wanna be a doctor, lawyer, or even a soldier… I wanna be a social worker… so simple because I only want to help… and being a social worker is a simple move for being of help.
I was impressed by the character he showed me…though I was lucky to interview, a guy like him who has a positive outlook in life… there could be other child warriors out there whose outlook in life were completely changed because of the experience… a disposition that is completely different from Sulman simply because of a painful event in their lives…
I have seen how the local government units of North Cotabato was doing their part in helping these people by conducting seminars and workshops for the victims and offering scholarships to children like Sulman, in order to heal the wounds caused by the conflict between AFP and MILF. And yet based on the interviews I had… no matter, how much they work on helping these individuals who went through so much trauma … if they don’t do something in putting this conflict to an end? All the effort is useless.
January 27, 2007… a conflict between AFP and MILF erupt again, this time in Midayap, Cotabato. Right there we saw how hard life is for the Victims… the only thing these victims do is going to evacuation centers and wait ‘til the war is over… Life in the evacuation is hard; people suffer due to sanitary problem. Painful as it may seem… I saw how children got sick and eventually die because of the lack of supplies in terms of food, medicines.
Innocent children, who has no control over the situations… are the most oppressed in the conflict… we need to break the chain of the 3-year-cycle of war between MILF and AFP. Goods and other supplies are not enough… This is not just their battle… it’s ours… what should be done about it?
My interview with Sulman would not be possible without the help of kind people in the Province of North Cotabato.
To Gvernor Piñol and all his staff.. thank you so much... also to Sir Joey of the Children of Peace, my heartfelt gratitude sir... :)
To DSWD of Midsayap, to Hon. Mayor Araña , Hon. Vice Mayor Rabara, (now a mayor) thank you so much for the security and your hospitality :)
Monday, February 16, 2009
I have been traveling from one place to another in search for what is there to know about life… and how things really are… and for those times that I travel to remote areas… Learning were always brought with me on my way back home… learning that cannot just be learned in school since I actually have experienced how life is in that nook of the country.
Part of the learning I have is seeing these children. Indeed, I have seen the difference between children in the cities and children in the rural areas where electricity isn’t even available.
What actually bothered me is that, children as young as 9month old suffers because of a non-ending cycle of war between AFP and Insurgents. As early as 10 years old, a kid already manages to fire a rifle against what they thought as enemies. A 4-5 year old kid is fascinated at the sight of Military and rebel group pointing guns at each other thinking that he/she is just watching a scene from a movie. Children along with their families were put to evacuation centers for quite a time, where kids usually end up getting sick and hungry… some even died because of limited supplies of food and medicines.
We look at children as innocent human beings… helpless… who do not have the capacity to take care of themselves… they look up on adults for protection… but how? When even their parents suffer because of the never-ending conflict between the AFP and rebel groups, we know that they are our responsibility. In those cases I presented… apparently, children’s rights were violated.
Somehow, thinking about these children made me ask… whatever happened to the ceasefire agreement between the AFP and the other rebel groups? Whatever happened to the peace process? What is the government’s stand regarding this conflict? Hmmmm… continue to give relief goods to the victims? Will this suffice? After a few weeks of a conflict, people from the government would say… everything is under control… everything is being taken care of… and yet… after 3 years another conflict erupts again… Perhaps they would do the same actions, say the same things…
Here’s the thing… conflict between the AFP and rebel groups has been a 3-year-cycle for decades now… can we afford another more discord 3 years from now… and relive the trauma to those people who are directly affected by it? How many more child warriors would risk their lives to battle? War has a great effect to the victims… though healing has took place… there will always be times when they are haunted by the experience. What’s most sad about this truth is that the most affected in this dispute are children… How are we going to help them?
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
There are moments in our lives when we feel that darkness surrounds us... But it is in this moment when we are reminded to take heart that there are better learning... better opportunities comes even when the road were trudging seem so dark. It is a perfect moment to realize that we need God. It is in moments of challenge that we see greater qualities that we never thought we possess.
So when you seem to be bombarded with unfavorable circumstance in your life... remember the genius who quoted this line: "When it's dark enough, men see the stars..." Let me add this up: "And the stars will help you find your way." (All smiles.)
My name does not determine who I am. I am not just a woman, nor does my clothes reveal my real identity, not even with the occupation that I have, or the religion that I have. My body does not reveal who I am really.
In this world, we all play a role. I am an actor playing a role in the drama of the world... I am the master of my body, I am the power within my body just as you are with yours...
Am a Soul... that is my spiritual identity. My body is the instrument of my being. Who am I? I am a SOUL.
Monday, February 9, 2009
When you enter the restaurant, you would definitely notice the interior and some stuff that is brought all the way from
It actually took us 4 hours to actually finish the entire shoot… not to mention the bloopers on the set (lol). After the commercial, we had the chance to taste their specialty… and man? It is delectable…
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Friday, February 6, 2009
"i think there is a very strong need for me to clean my emotional house today. i need to toss out things that are keeping me from moving forward. If i am still nursing a heartache, that's one thing -- but if i am still wallowing in my self pity or pain, then that's quite another. maybe i should Let go the past and focus on my dreams for the future. i think i have been carrying this pain for too long. The fact is, i am the one who can decide to be happy or decide to be sad. Which will it be?"
Hmmm... just don't understand... you do know what to do...only you're stubborn. Move on if you really want to. You said it yourself, you have been carrying that load for a time... dont you think its about time that you unload it?
THE THING IS: No one can decide for you... no one can help you unless you help yourself. Accept the things that had happen and go on. Coz you know what? the only thing that can help you move on is your DECISION to ACCEPT what has been done. That's the only way you can start anew. STOP BROODING OVER THE PAST. You owe that t yourself.
I just hope you decide on to the better solution... its all up to you... all you have to do is to DECIDE... DECIDE NOW and DECIDE FAST.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Going to the place is such a challenge... 30minutes is spent on a boat... another 45minutes on a cab trudging on a rough and bulky road... and just when you thought you have arrived? You'd realize that you still need to trek down a kinda narrow trail to finally step into that white sand...(whew!)
At last, I finally witnessed, what my friends have been bragging about... its actually not well renovated kind of resort, as a matter of fact, it is not really well developed. But what brought the people to the place without having to think of the quite arduous travel? It's the simplicity itself. A perfect place for reflection and just feeling the moment... the simplicity of the place that makes a person feel at peace.
It is a good place to remember how its like to be content of what is in the moment, and still feel joyful even how simple things can be. A perfect moment to realize that beautiful things can be found in simple moments.
I call it the Virgin Island, because of its natural beauty really amazed me... there is no electricity in the place, so you need to make use of sulo (gas lamp) for a light. But what's so good about that moment is that you realize how bright stars shines that it can serve as a light in the night... so bright that its rays reflects on the body of water. Another thing that made me in so much awe is that there are still fireflies on the place, I don't normally see that in the city because of so much pollution... looking at them feels like I'm in Paradise.
And at the break of dawn? It seems like I'm staring at a big and beautiful painting... so lovely that I can't seem to take my eyes off that sky.
Ironic that I can feel scared and excited at the same time... I cant seem to keep my thoughts from wandering away... exploring ideas the place is feeding me... A place indeed so wonderful... so lovely... so peaceful.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
"She looked at the sky and gaze at the stars… it was wonderful… and definitely look peaceful in the middle of the night. Then tears fell from her eyes. She thought that everything about it was so good and that everything should be good… but it wasn’t that way… because her heart bleeds."
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
The question is… am I even ready for anything right now? Am I ready for these changes?
I heard someone said, “You have to be ready to embrace whatever comes along… be adaptable.”
It pays to be adaptable. I am aware of that. Its just that this is one of those moments when I feel so scared about things… like those moments when I needed strong words that will help me fill my confidence tank that will somehow give me enough strength to handle what comes along and handle it wisely.
Meet Rai-Rai, an 18 year-old Mamanwa, and she’s proud of it. I met her last June 2008 when I started working in the Philippine Association for Intercultural Development (PAFID) Inc.
She is sweet and thoughtful, always wear a smile and her laugh is very contagious. She lightens up the crowd.
I once had a talk with her one night, and she shares with me her experience before the kind hearted employees of PAFID helped her with her Education.
During her early years, she would walk 4 kilometers a day to reach school, and there were even times that she has to attend school not caring if she has food as long as she can attend the class.
But what is so remarkable about her is that she is determined to finish school and to make something out of herself someday. She’d do everything just to finish school, support family and to be of service to her tribe. She is a Mamanwa, and she is proud to be one. And you know what? I am proud of her too.
At this moment, I am so inspired by life’s wonders. This moment teaches me that even handicaps can be extraordinary… indeed I am inspired by the life of a man who once said that “You don’t have to be handicapped to be different, everybody is different.” The guy who has been the inspiration in the award winning movie: “Rain Man”, the real Raymond Rabbit… Kim Peek.
He can finish reading EIGHT BOOKS in ONE DAY… or read a SINGLE PAGE in just TEN SECONDS. Imagine that. Amazing, isn’t it? What’s more remarkable is that… everything he read since THREE years old were preserved. And to think he was diagnosed to be mentally retarded. And that the doctors recommend him to be put to an institution. But his parents stand with their son and took care of him.
Based on the research, by the UC San Francisco, Kim has a different brain structure… he doesn’t have a division on his brain like most normal brains (it doesn’t have a left and right brain), He has a great memory when it comes to information, however, he has deficits when it comes to THEORY OF MIND (the ability of a person to understand what the other person is thinking) meaning he doesn’t know how to conceptualize. He can give you facts about different events, politics, numbers… but he can’t explain why.
He is just one example of a person who has savant autism. Until now, the reason unto why individuals experience this kind of defect is still not known. And up to this date, there is still no cure for it.
I admire the patience and effort Fran Peek gave to his son. Indeed it is not easy taking care of Kim 24 hours a day. And yet he did it anyway… out of his love for Kim. They worked hand in hand to inform the world about autism and be an example to those parents who has kids with autism.
Their story brought learning to me… Kim Peek, on his own way was able to make an important role in the world, because of him being autistic. He had opened people’s eyes to look at individuals with autism with respect and understanding. He did his part. And he was good at it.
If people like Kim Peek can make a difference, why can’t we do the same? In our own simple ways, we can make things happen.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Ayyi and I went on for a walk and both agreed to have an Ice Cream so we headed on a restaurant... and we delighted ourselves with a chocolate parfait. (hmmm... so sweet!!!) It's not really everyday that you get the chance to see an inspiration from other people... and I had that chance today... and I am thankful that I had that moment with Ayyi.
I was kinda surprised to hear that someone we knew is really into some difficulty... more than that of I am experiencing at the moment... but it doesnt seem to be visible in her eyes... she is a picture of a light hearted person... she is so cheerful and so down to earth that I didn't know she is facing a great challenge in her life... from her, I gained an inspiration... She inspired me to look at life with high hopes... she reminds me that I am not the only person going through so much difficulty... and that no matter what a person is going through... how one look at things makes the difference. She looked at life with a spark in her eyes despite the challenges. I believed, that moment was for me... a moment for me to look at my life with a smile on my face... believing that things will fall just fine... as said... "if fear knocks on the door of your heart, send faith to open it and you will be free from distress."
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Sometimes, when we feel entirely depressed about the situation we are in, we try to hold on to it a little longer, thinking it would somehow ease the pain. And in times like this, it is indeed so hard to look at things with a spark in our eyes when you feel your heart is deeply mourning...
But what we somehow neglect, is that even those moments when we are in pain, is a blessing. It may be hard to understand when we are in a hurtful situation... but as the moment fades, you'll then realize that it is a great blessing indeed. It is in this moment when we feel pain that we are given the chance to have a thorough reflection... both mind and heart. A moment, when we learn the lesson of humility and endurance... a perfect moment to understand those people who have also been experiencing pain... a perfect moment to reach out to those people who is in dire need for company... as they said, "who is more to understand someone in pain, than that who also experience the same way".
I myself couldn't look at things with gratitude sometimes when I feel really bad... and all I want is to pamper that hurt by locking myself in my room and cry it out thinking it would do me good. Sometimes, it does it help, but crying it out over and over again is like running in circles and not moving on.
I had that moment of pain... and it took me a while to realize that I am just finding an excuse to face the real situation of the matter... and the only way that helped me get through the dilemma of getting out of the comfort zone, is a moment spent with isolation and a prayer. A way of clearing my mind and heart of the negative emotions and thoughts running over me... also a moment to grasp good thoughts through prayers...
This day is indeed important to me... because I am looking beyond my "thinking only of myself" and think about the other who needs me the most.
Where do we go when everything else falls apart? How do you keep yourself back on your feet when your strength has left? So you see. Things are different, and you realized that people you know are not really the person you thought they were, even if you know them all your life. And you end up getting hurt even more.
You tried so hard to make things okay, but with all the effort, everything seems to be useless, because no matter what you do, things will never be the same again. How do you brace yourself to still continue to live your life with a smile on your face, when you know that deep inside, you are deeply shattered? Why do you have to forgive someone, who doesn't even ask for it? How do you forget? How do you start all over without remembering that painful past? How do you look at someone without a picture of yesterday that caused you to change? How do you build broken relationships?
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
What is meditation?
according to Wikipedia:
Meditation describes a state of concentrated attention on some object of thought or awareness. It usually involves turning the attention inward to a single point of reference. Meditation is often recognized as a component of eastern religions, where it has been practiced for over 5,000 years. Different meditative disciplines encompass a wide range of spiritual and/or psychophysical practices which can emphasize development of either a high degree of mental concentration, or the apparent converse, mental quiescence.
Why do we have to meditate?
Not only does meditation plays a big help in quieting the mind, it also helps treat and prevent heart disease, diabetes, arthritis, strokes and other diseases as well a blood pressure in people with hypertension.
I'm actually starting to meditate these days... and believe me... it does help. :)
Friday, January 9, 2009
After 2 months, I finally finished reading the book of Dr. Laura Schlessinger’s “Bad Childhood – Good Life” (the longest time I’ve ever read a book, by the way). For some reasons, I wasn’t so comfortable reading the book, it kinda bring a pang of pain. And I’m not actually the type who wants to go back to the scenarios and relive the animosity again. At first, reading the book is such a dilemma… since there were some insights in the book that seemed to be paradoxical in the way I’m used to deal with people and life itself. So I put the book down and stopped reading it for a week… only to pick it up again eager to know where the book is driving at.
Though some points in the book seem to be contradictory to what I believed in… there are also points that are indeed rightful and helpful in making a life better. Indeed, it is really a matter of choice. Like choosing to stay in the comfort zone, and linger on to what you are used to… or staying out of it and choose to welcome growth.
At some point, the book has inspired me in looking at life… making decisions… and what I want out of it. I have always wanted to be independent, and my being independent gave me the opportunity to grow, along with that learning is the realization that being independent doesn’t mean being alone. That family will always be family and it is meant to be celebrated all the time. And I learned to appreciate the things life has offered me. And value the people who have shown kindness and love… people that I sometimes neglect… family.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
For the past few days, I get to encounter this line at most times: “LET GO OF YOUR ISAAC.” I can’t help but think about it.
As Carissa and I were on our way home… I shared with her those words that have been bothering me for days.
ME: “They keep telling me about letting go of my Isaac, but I don’t even know what my Isaac is.”
CARISSA: “Isipin mo yung isang bagay na nagpapasaya sayo na kailangan mong pakawalan kasi yun ang dapat.”(Think of something that makes you happy but has to let go because it is the right thing to do.)
I was silent for a moment… then she went on…
CARISSA: “I’ve been there, God told me to let go of my Isaac and si _____ ang Isaac ko. I obeyed, it wasn’t easy but still I obeyed and I’m glad I did. God gave me something better.”
On my way home, Carissa’s words sank in to me… I keep repeating those lines in my mind: “Let go of my Isaac” while trying to reflect on my life at the very moment. I know in my heart that I have to let go of something… but I just don’t know what it is.
Then a certain scenario flashed my mind. I was torn between two options. I guess this is what it’s all about. And I realized that this has been goin’ on for quite a time now, and I guess I really have to make a decision now… I have to get out of my comfort zone once again and face the upcoming events of my life. I have to give up what I have been holding on for some time now, start another level of maturity. Accepting that, it is just not the right time for me to have what I have always wanted, I have to let God decide unto which road to take.
That was my Isaac… giving up the thing that mattered so much to me, and allowing God to take control of my life.
Friday, January 2, 2009
One can choose to whine about how sour can a lemon be, how one's face pucker because of it, and yet continue to taste that sour lemon because that's the way it has always been… instead of making a fuss about that lemon who would always be sour? One can choose to simply find another way of enjoying that lemon... squeezing the juice perhaps... add sugar... makes lemonade.
It’s not about how sour the lemon is. It’s about how one deal with it and makes use of the sour lemon. It’s like staying out of the comfort zone… staying out of what it has always been… if one knows that it hurts, one can always find a way to transform that hurt into something better. Why linger on something not rewarding when one can move on to something more worthwhile?